The hidden face of domestic violence

By Vesna Vuynovich Kovach In Brava Magazine, February 2010 What kind of woman gets herself into an relationship with an abusive man, and stays even after he becomes violent? What do friends and family typically advise her as the entanglement develops? What does an abused woman look like? How prevalent is domestic abuse, and how bad does it usually get? I was shocked by what I learned when I explored these and other questions for my article, "The hidden face of domestic violence," for the February issue of Brava Magazine. In the article, I present the stories of three Madison-area women who tell, in their own words, how they found themselves enmeshed with intimate partners who beat, manipulated and dominated them, even as friends and family -- and even a university dean, in one woman's case -- saw only the charismatic, assertive men who presented a positive front to the outside world. To learn more about how domestic violence develops and how you can keep it from happening to you -- or your daughter -- visit DAIS (Domestic Abuse Intervention Services, a Dane County, Wis. nonprofit) or the Family Violence Prevention Fund.